Set LDFLAGS and CFLAGS when you run make:
$ LDFLAGS="-L/home/me/local/lib" CFLAGS="-I/home/me/local/include" make
If you don't want to do that a gazillion times, export these in your .bashrc (or your shell equivalent). Also set LD_LIBRARY_PATH to include /home/me/local/lib:
export LD_LIBRARY_PATH=$LD_LIBRARY_PATH:/home/me/local/lib