I had the same warning using the raster package.
> my_mask[my_mask[] != 1] <- NA
Error: cannot allocate vector of size 5.4 Gb
The solution is really simple and consist in increasing the storage capacity of R, here the code line:
##To know the current storage capacity
> memory.limit()
[1] 8103
## To increase the storage capacity
> memory.limit(size=56000)
[1] 56000
## I did this to increase my storage capacity to 7GB
Hopefully, this will help you to solve the problem Cheers